Monday, December 19, 2005

Incompetence With A Dash of Ignorance

First time? Start here. Read "The Primer" and follow the link at the end. Chronological order makes more sense for the stories. This isn't a story along that follows the theme of the site, its from a few weekends back that I need to vent out:

Saturday was a long ass day for me. Woke up at 7:45 to take my star soccer player to her soccer game with my brother. Great game, the winning goal scored by my star soccer player's team was done with literally a minute left on the clock. Undefeated still. Then, came the confirmation call to go to the USC/Stanford game at 7pm. My friend told me to be at his house at roughly 3pm so finding parking isn't an issue. No problemo, I tells him. I head in his direction around a quarter to 3pm and being that I was parched I pulled into the local WacArnold's to grab myself a tasty beverage.

"Powerade with no ice," I tell the local clod on the other end of the drive-thru speaker.

I pull up to the window, fork over a bill and some shiny coins.

"Can you pull up, please?" asks said clod.

"Pull up? I wanted a large Powerade."

"Yes, please."

5 minutes pass, I am on the phone with Florida's favorite son and fellow Angry Timer, RaeRae, and I start realizing that I ordered a fucking fountain drink and I am sitting in my car, like a chump, waiting for it. Let's put it into further perspective, I'm waiting in my car for some clod to dispense it from the fucking machine, that does all the work for her, into a cup. Why am I waiting?

"Fuck this," I tells RaeRae, "Hold on, time to raise some hell."

I enter the domain of WacArnold's and see three women dishing up fries, cokes and two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions all of which happen to be served on a sesame seed bun encased in recycled camel spittle that has been dehydrated to resemble a cardboard-like polymer.

"Hey!" I shout letting them know that Northe is serious business.

"I'm waiting on a large Powerade."

Clod looks at me, hands me a large cup, points and says, "Fill over there."

Knowing that my rage to alcohol ratio is deathly low, I can make no savagely placed crane beaks about the clod's body. My friend is awaiting my arrival at his house so we can jet to the game. I take the high road, fill up my cup with the tasty blue liquid and leave. My friend calls me up asking me where I am, I release the steam pent up and paint the interior of the establishment in my mind with the body parts of said clod. I feel better, arrive at his house and we head for the USC campus.

All was right for the most part, parking was found in 5 minutes, we had sushi at the student cafeteria prepared by an asian woman that had what I presume to be a name tag that read, "Fight On!" So being the prick that I am, decided to address her as Fight On! whenever we were in need of additional raw fish on our plates. After a satisfying meal we went downstairs to the on-campus underground dive bar. It was packed so I tell my friend, "Fuck this man, let's go to the sto'."

For those that have no clue, "the sto'" is ebonics for the liquor store. Being that we were in the heart of the hood it seemed not only hip but appropriate with bonus points for context. We walked almost a mile to the nearest liquor store and stocked up, trekked back to the Coliseum and pounded them down. We find our seats and get to enjoying the football game. Then, in attempts to kill my buzz, two hispanic girls bent on tequila and a husband/wife duo with their 4 year old son two rows behind where my friend and I sat swallowed their time-release, and FDA approved, Idiocy Pills.

Sidebar: If you don't know, at sporting events there are season pass deals that ensure people the same seats, every game, for however many years they have been season pass holders. Most of the people that have season passes have known the people that sit around their immediate area for years. So, in scenarios like this, its hard to gank seats. Which is exactly what these two girls were trying to do.

Fucko, the husband, decides to be the first to break the ice, "Are those your seats?"

The girls ignore him and he asks about three more times. Fucko's wife decides to chime in, "Excuse me ladies, are those your seats? I don't think they are."

This goes on for a few minutes where the girls refuse to show their tickets and the interrogation degenerates into off the cuff insults which were all just pathetic at best. Said insults were peppered with vulgar expletives to make their shouting seem witty and innovative.. maybe even to add a sting. Sorry guys, failure is failure even when you're drunk. Then, before I know it, the ignorance bomb is dropped.

"They're just assholes bcuz they are white," says one of the girls.

Alright, let's take a look at shit here and I'll give you my perspective before we go on. The girls obviously don't belong in the seats; however, my deal is that if no one is sitting there anyway, why not let them sit there? When the seat holders come, you kick the girls out. Its not rocket science. Them being in those seats isn't hurting anyone. On the other hand, the girls are the ones that are breaking the rules and are sitting where they shouldn't be, leaving themselves open for criticism and correction. Yet in their infinite void of wisdom, the only reason they are being chastised is bcuz they are hispanic and the people behind them are white. Have I told you how much I love humanity? Have I told you how much I love how people exonerate themselves for bad behavior by making themselves victims? Have I expressed these common urges I get to shove ice picks into the aural cavities of most everyone?

You do something stupid, you reap the consequences and regardless of the fact that people may have sinister motives when calling you out does not justify your bad behavior. Pointing at bad behavior to excuse other bad behavior is the way the world works now and it sickens me more and more. Do the right thing and you keep yourself out of a lot of bullshit. I learned this a few years late in my life but at least I fuckin learned it.

The conclusion is nothing, my buddy told everyone to shut the hell up and cool down. Eventually an usher came, checked the tickets of the girls and told them to shove off. My criticism to the Whitey's is that they could have avoided confrontation with the girls, rather than expose their 4 year old son to baboonish behavior, called an usher over from the get and handled it that way. This is a bitch's way out but hey, the problem is nipped in the bud. Again, my stance on the situation: Let the girls stay there since no one is being adversely affected by what is happening and enjoy the frikkin football game. I hate humanity and its a Monday on top of that.. gonna be a long week. Angry times.

7 comments:

guy in the UNLV jacket said...

The white folks werein the wrong on that one. Not because they were white or because the chicks are hispanic. They were just a couple of anal jerks who should have been spat upon.

Phelps said...

I wouldn't have bothered unless they were an affront to my 4 year old. However, if the real ticket holders showed up, and fisticuffs ensued, I would be more than there. (Which is probably right, since I would likely have instigated said fisticuffs.)

I'm taking off on vacation tomorrow at the end of the workday, so it is getting very difficult for me to not ask everyone to get the beers in. Plus, I am giving moonshine for Christmas to selected hep people here at the office, which I will have to part out into pint mason jars tonight, and I have resolved myself to simply consume any leftovers. So I'll be getting something in tonight, but it will likely be solotary.

Anonymous said...

Oh white people.. always so testy and angry at Mexcians for stealing their dream jobs of being a janitor or mechanic, and of course... football seats...

I agree with you Fist and UNLV. It shouldn't fucken matter until the owners of the seats come to claim their thrones. If they get all cunty after that, a swift throat punch is well deserved. We can even get the four year old involved by giving 'em a couple labia foot checks for some early White Tiger Kung Fu Training.

Mexigogue said...

I have not yet graduated to the Powerade machine sir. Fire at will!

HMT said...

I saw Metallica at the Coliseum a few years back. Fuck that place.

although at that event there were plenty of white people - probably the most that venue had seen since the "Monsters of Rock 1988" tour.

Northe said...

Hahahah HMT, perfection comes easy for you at times.

Phelps said...

Did the Monsters of Rock 88 tour include Poison and Grim Reapers? Perhaps Winger?