Angry Time Observations

First time? Start here. Read "The Primer" and follow the link at the end. Chronological order makes more sense for the stories.

We're off topic today. Let's see what I can fish up and just rant about. Hey I know, let's go after the movies we are being subjected to. Generally speaking, the last few months of movies spewed out by Hollywood some words that come to mind are feeble, shameful and deplorable.

Agree or disagree?

Seriously, what are you gonna throw at me? Cloverfield? Please. Like I shouted from the rooftops for months, if you knew me, that shit was gonna be Blair Witch on the streets of New York. You can easily come to the conclusion that it will be pure garbage when you see the name J.J. Abrams affiliated with that shit. This motherfucker has brought some of the biggest disappointments in television history in recent years with the titles Alias and Lost. Now I know a bunch of you teet sucklers are still begging for Lost to be worth a shit but I seriously doubt it. The guy comes up with great ideas but can't finish em. He's the typical Hollywood writer that comes out with an idea with tremendous potential but can't deliver a stable storyline that stands the test of time let alone the mental strength to figure out how to end it! Case in point is how he wrecked Alias in the last couple seasons and what he did with fuckin Cloverfield!

Don't get me started on that salty wad of lung cheese. That mother fucker promoted the shit outta this film, which is what he does best (note references above and realize they are all successful products due to his hype machine), as some sort of monster movie in which the monster is seen for all of a handful of minutes but then, THEN this mother fucker had the audacity to score a zero on the creativity scale by making it a sorry ass love story. That's right, the shit is a fuckin love story, say otherwise and you're fulla shit. There is no action, there are no redeeming qualities.. taking it one further, if you felt any fright in this movie you'd probably go sleepless for a week after watching Gremlins, you colossal puss. The only thing you're left with at the end of this movie is hope and mystery. The same hope and mystery that will get your sorry ass to shell out more money in the future.

The movie is peppered with small tidbits of information that the average maggot in society finds hearty enuff to feast on.. sure, there'll be a 2nd Cloverfield and a 3rd.. all the while J.J. will throw you some bones but the big picture will end up being either A) missing or B) pointless. Come on you Lost fans.. sounds pretty fuckin familiar, doesn't it? Face the facts, jack.. horrible movie, poorly done and executed with the precision of a blind truck driver.

Sidebar: Before you think I put up my hard earned money to watch this movie know that I snuck in like a high school reject.. jeah, bitches!

What about Atonement? I watched this with my girlfriend via our friend the internet and those wacky illegal websites willing to give us access to movies for no cost. Saving money while being afforded the luxury to watch something I doubt I will enjoy? Sounds like a winner to me.

Don't worry, I'll sum up this movie in short order. 20 minutes into the movie my girlfriend, the love story queen of the ages, suggested we turn off the movie as it has already shown itself to be an over-hyped, hodgepodge of slow play half-drama seasoned with "dramatic" shots of panning over green-screen landscapes that take up 20 minutes of your life without giving you any sort of element that would be linked with relevance. The sad fact is I can see some of you wow'ing at the idea to present a movie without telling a story half the time as being "revolutionary" so hey, if that's your thing go back to your independent film making and keep living on top ramen.. you're ruining the perception of what a quality product is. At least do me the decency of only subjecting it to your inner circle of friends whose idea of a good time is rubbing cocaine on their gums, you ephemeral aristocrats.

I will give the writer a dash of credit with the "surprise" ending as I am a man that expects things created thru imagination to be concluded with just as powerful, if not a more powerful, sense of imagination that it started with. This is the only thing in that flick that stuck with me, a twist for an ending that was too little too late.. its kind of like sifting thru a bowl of phlegm and finding a brownie bite. Oh and don't think I forgot about you Hollywood.. way to honor this garbage with hundreds of awards.. you posse of worthless, self-righteous douchebags..

To quote my liege Braveheart, "I'm not finished!" How about the last ones I reduce to jelly and sinew are the well-paid analysts, commentators and "experts" that pounded us for weeks with their completely incorrect opinions about the Super Bowl? How about we knee cap these sad sack, self-important jackoffs that can be so dead wrong with no consequence. The weathermen of the sports world.. this fraternity of doe-eyed band wagoners. Am I a Giants fan? Fuck no. Did I think the Giants would win, not a chance. So why am I being such a dick about this?

Cuz I'm not paid for my opinion!

How can everyone be so fuckin wrong about something that was seemingly so set in stone? I am a huge football fan, huge. There is no time of the year that is better in my opinion than football season.. and to see the dumb fuckin looks on all these assholes faces tells me there is something right in the world. No matter what everyone is saying, no matter how loud the voices, no matter how strong the opinion you still gotta play the game. You still gotta play the game. Tremendous respect for the Giants. You gotta believe that, even if you're a Patriots fan.. you got punched in the mouth and didn't get back up. You got beat, plain and simple. If Eli woulda been having one of his great games, far and few between as they may be, it woulda been a fuckin stomping.. believe that. Its season enders like this that make us love the game.

One more thing before I end this one. Tiki Barber, you look like a complete idiot. How can your colleagues even look you in the eyes? From day one you built the foundation of your career on shit talking the Giants organization, Eli Manning, Tom Coughlin and your teammates. You sorry pathetic piece of shit, you look like a complete joke. Sure as fuck seems like there was a locker room problem on that team and it resolved itself once you left. That's gotta taste sweet to those that you railroaded for all those months. You sorry ass weatherman, desktop squawk box. Its only people like you and those propped up to such prestigious positions in society and government that can be so painfully and terribly wrong yet still keep their jobs and continue to make more money than most of the population based on a short-sided, biased and the just plain wrong opinion of what you thought Giants football was about. I'll go back to doing the job I do so fuckin well while being held accountable for it like the majority of the world.

Eat shit. Let nothing or no one be safe from the scope of my vision.. especially those that deserve to be called out by society based on the all-too-obvious. Angry Time in effect. Till next time.