Tuesday, August 30, 2005

Spelling Bee Part 2

First time? Start here. Read "The Primer" and follow the link at the end. Chronological order makes more sense for the stories.

Who would have thought that I would have another story about this topic in such succession and who really cares..

Its about noon. Female Boss is reviewing a proposal letter to a potential new client that introduces all of us to the company in question. Now whenever Male Boss writes the first draft of these letters it is peppered with terrible grammar and misspellings. Hmm, this is a huge understatement, lets try it again.. its more like trying to proof read a 2nd grade ESL student writing an essay on taxation.

Male and Female Boss have been in business together for about 15 years now, more or less. While proofreading Male Boss' work, Female Boss turns to me in disgust, "He doesn't know how to spell my name.."

"Male Boss?" I ask.

"Yeah, that piece of shit can't spell my name. Its embarrassing."

I start to laugh and shake my head.

With perfect timing, Male Boss comes out of the back of the house wearing skimpy spotted underwear. Yes underwear, colored and spotted, elastic-banded skimpies. Let me remind you he is European-ish and I don't think I have mentioned before, we have a sauna at this investment property that he loves to use when he has free time.. that or when he feels like neglecting work, which is more often than when he has free time.

So here he is, wearing virtually nothing and wading into a scalding pool of verbal abuse without knowing it. For all intents and purposes we'll say Female Boss' name is Janet. Here we go:

"Male Boss, how do you spell my name?" she starts with an echoing shout.

"I know how is spells your name," says Male Boss.

"Really? Spell it."

"Janet? Come on. Zis is stupid."

"Spell it you stupid piece of shit!" she yells again.

"G - I - N, no wait. G - I - N - I - T. Janet," he says proudly.

"I hate you, I hope you collapse in the sauna."

4 comments:

Phelps said...

Did he collapse in the sauna?

Northe said...

No :(

HMT said...

Sauna collapsing! haha.

Europeans are so wierd. At least they are strong like France.

Northe said...

Its all about elastic banded underwear around the office and nothing more. I know it makes me feel comfortable.