Female Boss Shorts 12

First time? Start here. Read "The Primer" and follow the link at the end. Chronological order makes more sense for the stories.

Another pair of 'em. She just doesn't disappoint. Quality and quantity. I love it.

Scenario #1: The office is nice and quiet. The gentle crackle of Demonseed cracking open sunflower seeds and enjoying her lunch is all that can be heard. Then it happens.

"Hiiiiiii!"

I turn to see Female Boss with a bright eyed smile on her face staring at Demonseed who stares at her for a second and gets back to eating. Female Boss gets up to her seat to approach Demonseed's cage. Demonseed stops eating again to stare at Female Boss.

"Hi. Helloooo? Hi," says Female Boss as she creeps closer and closer to the cage.

"You're not speaking to me? Hmm?"

"Are you hibernating, Demonseed?"

"You're hibernating aren't you?"

"You're hibernating!"

"You're a bear?"

"A dozing bear!?"

"You're a fluffy and sleeping bear!?" Her voice climbs higher and squeaks as she says bear. It sounds like a shovel being scraped against a rock. Each sentence comes about ten seconds later than the last. Rather than questioning what in the holy fuck this idiot was saying, I just watched Demonseed who had resumed scooping food into that angry beak and crunching down on food after about the second sentence. The look on the bird's face was perfect.. not differing from any other day. Its just that the blank stare of "what the fuck are you doing" was plastered on it. It spoke volumes to me as Demonseed dove back into the food dish time and time again locking eyes with Female Boss as she spewed nonsense over and over again. The bird would have the same look on its face if Female Boss' head happened to be resting on that rock.. and that shovel was in my grip readied for a proper beat down.. I think Demonseed and I had a moment.

Scenario #2: Female Boss is planning a getaway to one of the Plastic's house for the weekend. This set of Plastics live on the beach in a pretty sick place, supposedly. Female Boss deemed fit to suck up office and company time to plan her weekend plans for a good couple of hours. Things were winding down to the final arrangements when Female Boss started to protest some of the specifics.

With an air of arrogance on her breath, "You shouldn't have your mom stay in the family room."

After pretending to listen and care what the Plastic had to say Female Boss shot back again, "I am sleeping in there when I visit. No. Period. You're not giving it to her."

At this point I think that Female Boss and PlasticMom have had a prior tiff and there's not much friendship left between the two. How to be sure tho? Before I can concoct a plan to get it out of her, Female Boss interrupts my train of thought.

"Listen, just go out and buy a bed for her today and put it in the other room you wanted me to stay in."

That pretty much ended the conversation. Female Boss now off the phone lets out a deep and annoyed sigh. This is her usual priming of a conversation.. her predictability comes thru..

"They're made of money. They should just go buy her a bed. I want to stay in that room by myself."

"You guys don't get along?" I ask her.

"What? No. It's just that she's old and decrepit. She needs special care.. and if I am gonna be relaxing I don't want to have to worry about the old bag keeling over. Second of all, I don't need that kind of negative energy ruining my time at their house! Uh-uh. They need to do something about her."

Wow. Female Boss is an asshole. Talking about a friend's (dying?) mom like that? I would even find it hard to stoop that low.