Jedi Mind Tricks

First time? Start here. Read "The Primer" and follow the link at the end. Chronological order makes more sense for the stories.

Do I have to give any background on this expression? I'm a pretty big nerd, so yeah, I probably do. A Jedi Mind Trick, first of all, comes from Star Wars. Picture the scene where Obi Wan and Luke are in the desert, they approach the Storm Trooper guarding the city in the desert and Obi Wan waves his hand in front of the face of the Storm Trooper saying something and the Storm Trooper says exactly what Obi Wan said, get it? In the real world a Jedi Mind Trick is defined as a way to convince someone to think a certain way without effort. Its really big around people that have problems communicating, thinking and breathing rhythmically without making it a priority in their mind.

Its almost as if that very statement fits the mold of someone we know. Female Boss? Sure, why not..

I think this is a whole new level of consciousness. Female Boss had a meeting with a new Client at the Investment Property over the weekend, Saturday specifically. I guess Saturday is the same day that the house next door has their gardener come over to maintain the property. I have mentioned before but I'll mention again, for those that haven't read the entire blog or memorized all the ins and outs of the Investment Property, the lot the Investment Property sits on is not that big. The house next door, the one being worked on, is a corner lot. It is significantly larger and has a few pretty huge trees.

I seriously can't believe I am writing this.. its really sad. Female Boss is losing it. That's honestly what I fear at this point.

So two of the trees from the neighbor's yard really make a mess in our backyard. They shed large leaves year round. Female Boss complains about it pretty often. The genius of it all is she never says anything to them. My suggestion has always been to go next door and ask the guy to maybe trim em down a bit. They are very full trees and hacking off a few limbs couldn't hurt. Female Boss always agrees it is a good idea but never does anything about it. Basically she's scared.

So that Saturday, Female Boss musters up a revolutionary amount of courage.. explained to me using roughly the following statement:

"Oh! So Northe, get this, I was here Saturday and the gardeners were next door!"

I had no clue what significance that meant at the time so just stared blankly at my computer screen hoping for the swift death of as few brain cells as possible.

"You know how I hate those trees they have? Well.."

I interrupt her, "Oh nice, you told them to hack em down a bit?"

"No. I am so frustrated. Let me just tell you. I go into the backyard after the meeting and rake up the leaves as loudly as I can and start pruning the tree in the back."

Sidebar: Yeah. She said rake and loudly in the same sentence, and yes they have a lawn back there. How that is achieved I don't know. Furthermore, that tree she is referring to is a sapling at best. At best!

"I mean they must have seen me out there for a good 45 minutes before they left. They see me doing that stuff! I mean, come on, they didn't get the hint!? I don't even wanna talk about it. I don't know what else to do."

The final number of dead as far as my brain cells go is still undetermined. I think there are dozens still in the infirmary, still trying to hold on. Poor little guys. I don't have much hope for em but they'll go down fighting. No guys, no. I am not gonna go off on a rant about how dumb Female Boss is, how pressing upon her again that actually talking might be the best way to handle the situation or even that a letter would suffice. I'm just not. All that's gonna do is build up a lot of rage that might destabilize the brain cells in the ICU. Not gonna do it.