Don't Challenge The Professional

First time? Start here. Read "The Primer" and follow the link at the end. Chronological order makes more sense for the stories.

The Professional came in the other day with a great story. When it comes to his shit, its straight precise or its no dice. He doesn't deal with the nonsense but you guys know that. On with it!

He comes in and hands me a business card of some client actress that thinks she's queen shit. She's nothing to speak of, average at best in my book. I ask him, "What?"

"She's a stupid whore is what?"

I laugh at him.

"This stupid bitch is a fucking time waster. She has me go to pick her up at a restaurant that she is supposedly having brunch at. I get there, no whore. So I call the stupid bitch on her cell phone and say, 'Hey its me, I don't see you here, you said to be here at 12:30 and I have been here for over 15 minutes.' So the bitch then tells me that there was a change of plans. She is on the other side of the city about 50 miles away. Now says that she needs me to pick her up in about an hour, hour and a half at some fucking address she gives me. I say okay. I drive down that way, I am early. I get to the property and call her up. Then I have had it. The bitch tells me that she is not there and she won't be there for hours. I tell her to fuck herself and ask her why she is giving me specific times and places to be at if she isn't going to be there. Then, she tells me that there are plenty of people in our line of work and that she can find someone else. I tell her that's fine but you shouldn't be telling me to do things and I end up wasting my time. So this stupid bitch tells me that she went to business school in college, that she is some professional lady. That was it."

Sidebar: You use the word professional around The Professional and you aren't running the game like one, you are done deal. It becomes no holds barred, no remorse, hand of God type destruction. There's a reason the man is called The Professional on Angry Time. He let's her have it with no punches pulled.

"So she is arguing with me now, so I yell her down. 'Listen I don't know who the fuck you think you are but a professional business person does not hold appointment times to be broken twice in one day. Whoever you think you are talking to you are mistaken bcuz I will pick your ass up and drop you off in the desert and not think twice.'"

The best part is The Professional isn't kidding. He'll pull some gangster shit. I can see it in his eyes. Something about him. Even when he's telling me the story he's got that bloodthirst. Reminds me a lot of me.

"Then the bitch hangs up on me. I call her back. I know she will pick up bcuz she's so stupid she probably doesn't recognize the phone number cuz she answers all sweet and cute like some pussy kiss ass. So I tell her, 'Hey bitch, I wasn't done with you. You tell your lightweight, half-ass company to fuck themselves and never call on me again. Then you'll see who they go to in the end. It will be me, always. Enjoy your lunch.' And I hang up."

I'm laughing my ass off. "Enjoy your lunch" he tells her. This guy is king. I fuckin love it. The best part is as soon as I start asking if he's heard from our Client company he stops me mid-question and tells me that they heard what happened, apologized for her behavior and that they will continue to use him as a liaison. Proof is in the pudding, folk. Just as a follow up, they have used The Professional for several client meet ups since then. Talk about professional.