Female Boss Shorts 6

First time? Start here. Read "The Primer" and follow the link at the end. Chronological order makes more sense for the stories.

Since I have a lot of stories to catch up on and little gumption to make it happen I am bringing back the highly rated Female Boss Shorts for today's entry. Things at the office are as retarded as ever, I'm sure you can imagine so stay a while and listen. Here are some quick updates on some of the recent happenings.

Scenario #1: Female Boss landed the company a new Client. This is something new for her as its usually Male Boss' job and the Professional's job to get in the high class clientèle. Being that it is so unusual for Female Boss to score a new Client for us, you know that this was never meant to be. I am not sure how she met this women but her last name is Valdivia (Val-dee-vee-uh). Its a pretty difficult name to pronounce if you have no spanish influence around you. Female Boss, Angry Time's favorite New Jerseyite, is not the best at switching gears and turning on the spanish accent. In fact, she is so bad at it that she started calling our new client Mrs. Velveeta. That's right.. like the cheese.. while on the phone with her. The sad part is that she truly thought this was how to pronounce her name. It went on like this for about 2-3 weeks before the woman blew up on her. We are yet to get new assignments from her. Whether that is the reason for the falling out is still up for debate.

Scenario #2: Since Female Boss' splendid plan to get Demonseed a trainer things haven't been more hilarious. Recall that this man is a dog trainer, not a bird trainer. He does the training sessions, I use that term loosely, like he would a dog. Demonseed doesn't give a shit. All the bird knows is that attention is all the rave when Trainer steps in. Their latest teaching assignment for Demonseed? To throw debris out of its cage. Meaning that if you give Demonseed a sheet of paper, they are encouraging the bird to make a mess on the floor.. something that Female Boss and Male Boss have cursed to the high heavens about how many times a day they have to sweep under and around its cage! Something tells me that this bird is training the owners to accept the behavior, more like a reverse grooming. This is nothing new for Female Boss tho.. its what we have seen for years here. The owner bending to the will of the pet.. brilliant...

More updates to come.