Double Cha-jee

First time? Start here. Read "The Primer" and follow the link at the end. Chronological order makes more sense for the stories.

Back in the day a buncha my friends used to go grub sushi at this all-you-can-eat spot that was pretty good. The spot was definitely the place to grub down. It was like $25 for all the sushi you could muster in an hour and the quality, tho not top notch, was up there. The other plus about the place is that it was all-you-can-eat at the sushi bar only. So get the picture of some buffet style slopfest outta your head.

After a while of getting to know the sushi guys we started becoming revered patrons of the establishment. We'd walk in, get treated like kings and the fish would start heaping up in front of us. Even the manager would start talkin shit to us. We'd order certain things and he'd yell out with a thick accent, "Double cha-jee!" Which means double charge. It was funny ass shit and likely you had to be there to appreciate the humor. So, going on to what the day's latest brings at Angry Time..

Apparently Female Boss decided on getting a really nice care package for our top client for no specific reason. Essentially its a show of gratitude, something that will bring our two companies closer together. The gift is coming from a local eatery, Company. There are tons of different food items that she wants to give them. All fresh stuff, it would be a good amount for the employees to snack on all day when it arrives. Sounds like a plan from the heart to me.

The first problem that Company runs into is that Female Boss jotted down the wrong address to deliver the package to. Company calls up the office and I happen to pick up the line. They tell me the address Female Boss gave them. Its completely different than the company address we have in our database, different city and everything. I am now really confused. Its one of two things, either Female Boss is completely off her rocker or they have a corporate office or some such that she is wanting to deliver to. I don't want to make any assumptions so I take down the message for Female Boss and give it to her when she gets in.

"Oh okay. Yeah, I am sending it to their office location. The address we have is just their mailing address."

Fair enough. I'll just go ahead and pick up the phone to tell them the switch. What.. what am I doing? I thought she wanted the package to go out today. Female Boss leaves the office. Hmm.. that's completely outta the ordinary.. Female Boss is acting retarded.

To make a long story less exasperating I'll shorten things up. Over the next 8 work days I get 4 messages from Company complaining that the order was set for that particular day and that the contents of the package are no longer fit for consumption. Every single day they call I give Female Boss a verbal message along with a hand written note with their number and everything to make things very basic for her to understand.

As shocking as it may be, my efforts come to no avail. Female Boss still hasn't called up Company. Then, finally.. the golden opportunity surfaces. I receive a phone call from Company, again. Why these people are so persistent to begin with is beyond me. They have already been paid, what the fuck do they care at this point? Anyway, Female Boss is outside talking to the gardener when they call. I have to get her into the office. I am successful after a lot of hollering for her to get the phone. The best is how the conversation starts.

"Yes, hi," *pause* "Well I ordered that to be delivered like two weeks ago I don't understand why you guys' didn't deliver it," followed by the self-dissapointing "Oh."

Yeah that's right idiot. 'Oh' means you dropped the fuckin ball. After a few minutes on the phone I am happy to report: Comeuppence is at hand!!

"This is bullshit, Northe."

"What is?"

"They made me pay twice!"

"For the second package since you didn't call back and they couldn't deliver the first one?"

"They said I didn't call back in time. I had to pay the shipping cost again too!"

Yeah.. ignore me you jerkass.

"This is bullshit."

You're right. It is bullshit. Its bullshit cuz these people had to waste their fuckin time tracking your ass down. The best is that Female Boss is shocked and appalled cuz they accused her of not calling back in time. She never fuckin called! She was on the phone with them cuz they called her! Get a fuckin clue, idiot. For your insolence you get double cha-jee!